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Movie #1 - Tag

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Honestly, what to say about Tag, directed by some guy whose other notable IMDB credits include a TJ Miller special (ugh) and other comedy specials by standup fellows I do not know, this movie felt like a rehash of every other buddy comedy starring middle-aged men acting like buffoons. I know it's based on a Washington Post story, I know Annabelle Wallis's character was "real," but come on, the plot is so thin you couldn't hang your laundry on its line.

A bunch of guys have an ongoing game of tag that's continued into adulthood. <<SPOILER>> There's one of them who has a deeper reason for wanting this year to be the year that they finally get Jerry Pierce (Jeremy Renner), who, in all their years of playing, yawn, has never been tagged. That's it, that's the plot of the entire movie.

There are no "stakes" (except the "emotional" journey of Ed Helms's character Hoagie, but that's so manipulative and hamstrung honestly, I rolled my eyes so much). There's no character development. There's a great soundtrack, Jeremy Renner playing Hawkeye in the suburbs, Ed Helms typecast and playing every character he's ever played since The Hangover, Hannibal Burgess for the "dry wit," and Jake Johnson playing the character of "stoner." It's like a CBS sitcom where the women are inexplicably hot (Annabelle Wallis, Isla Fisher, and Rashida Jones) and their "doofy" husbands get up to hi jinx. And that's it. Let me give them the first rule that I try to tell all the young writers I'm working with now--character is not the same thing as story.

Honestly, yawn.

Plus, there isn't the keen wit of a film like Game Night where you feel like Rachel McAdam's character is not only in on the action, but a pivotal part in the film--no, this is yet another film from the POV of "good guys" just having "fun" and...what was I saying...yawn. The female characters are regulated to ridiculously stereotypical secondary roles where their only context is the men in the film and for the most part they aren't even ALLOWED TO PLAY THE GAME. Because the rules they made up when they were prepubescent boys reign? Really. REALLY?

I could say more but this film isn't worth a thousand words. It's not even worth critical thought. I mean, it's so frustrating to see a female journalist doing no real work except dropping everything to say the game of tag is the real story. Honestly? That's the real story? Without calling her editor, without consulting her HR travel budget, without bringing along a tape recorder (oh, wait, she's got a trusty pencil and paper!!!), she's "covering" this story. Please.

It made me furious.

On to this week's movie: Deadpool 2.
 

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